Is there anything scarier than a bathroom scale? Actually, yes, a tape measure can be just as scary especially when used to assess the size of one’s thighs. I’m not sure why I was drawn toward these torture devices, perhaps it’s because I’m feeling better from the cleanse, but it seemed like a good idea to establish a baseline in my quest towards health. A good idea, probably, but now I am fully depressed.
I cannot stop staring at the numbers on the piece of paper in front of me… it’s like watching a car crash– you know you shouldn’t stare but you just can’t help yourself. The numbers seem menacing, like they are mocking me. “Ha ha,” they say, “this is what you get for being lazy.” Having always been a very active person, who could eat just about anything at any time, I never thought about the consequences of inactivity on my hips. However, I did not factor in aging. I am experiencing the human equivalent of inverse ratio: as my age increases, my metabolism decreases.
So, now I have two choices: 1) wallow in my misery and comfort myself with a box of truffles, or 2) do something about it! As tempting as option #1 sounds, I know that option #2 is the one that will allow me to run the race toward peace. My challenge, however, is to stop myself from expecting changes to occur too quickly and stifle my all-or-nothing tendencies. Though I would love to drop 25 pounds and 15 inches by the beginning of April, I don’t think that is realistic and I will simply make myself crazy trying to accomplish it. I have spent the last year or more neglecting myself physically (as well as emotionally and spiritually) so it seems only logical of my state of affairs. As I seek to find strength, I know these numbers will change, but I must be willing to endure a little hardship. As Hebrews 12:3, 5-7 says:
Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart…. (and) do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son. Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons.